My family is driving me F***ing crazy! Last night at oh about 4AM my I hear my Mother screaming at someone.. Who?? I dont get up to see... I come home tonight to find the door wide open nobody here. So I tried to call my Mom, no answer. Then about 13 min later some guy from my Moms cell calls. ( guy is not my moms boyfriend cuz he is in the kitchen with me) Then ask me who I am and says wrong number, jerk! My Mom calls back drunk off her @$$, I swear she is the type of women that gives girls a bad name! and this is the type of crap I am suppose to look up to! WTF! I am soo mad write now when she gets home I am not going to take any of her crap to night, I am ready to rock and roll with her! I dont even care if she calls the cops on me. I am tired of all this drama, she just wants a guy to treat her like some dried up cow patty! Why dont you go back to that jerk you married before B!TCH!!! I think I really might hate my family right now... Why cant everyone just grow up???

I know that everyones famliy is not prefect, But why did I get put with the white trash? Theres just not enough answers... Why? I feel like everytime I start to take one step forward I just get pulled up back two. And people keep asking me about school? How am I suppose to go do good in college when I live in a zoo!?! I would not be able to get any work done here.. And NO I cant move out Nathan! Is just not that easy to have a car, school, insurance, phone, study, work, and still make it! I would starve to death, and I am not going to skim by on my friends.. I swear today was going great till about 9PM and everything just has to go wrong.

I was Bobs house babysitting and they were talking to me about going to UCI, saying I could stay with some of there famliy even. Bob even went as far as going to the website and looking up some student aid. But you know good things just dont seem to happen, and I guess as soon as I am wise enough to see that, then and only then might be able to deal/put up with all the BS that goes on! If you cant beat em' join em' This is not the type of person I am nor want to be, but is weird out people just seem to be able to bring out the best in people.. I hate hearing all these other kids/teens complain about there parents cuz they can stay out late. Well atleast they care, my Mom has not called to check on my in the past two days. I have been coming home to sleep but does she know that? NO! I could have face down in some ditch, and the world would not know or care. This is the type stuff worth living for? This BS! I cant say I blame the people that take there own lifes, we dont know the crap they went through before.. But we just talk about how wrong it was, might it be we are the ones that are wrong. I am just going to try to go read the bible alittle calm down, and see if I can possibly make it another day. Ofcourse we all can make it it's just a matter of wether or not we really want to. So the big question is do we want to???